im always like hehe im so smart i will avoid shame by never doing anything ever but then i feel ashamed of not living and it turns out i didn’t escape any sort of discomfort i just traded it in for a less rewarding kind
Rejection-sensitive or not, you have to accept when people say “no” and realize that people’s “no” is not about you. A boundary is never about you, it’s about that person’s sense of security. Do not make people’s personal limits a matter of targeted offence.
Not tryna to hijack the post as I 10000% agree
I just wanted to add some resources cuz I have ADHD and struggled (still struggle) with rejection-sensitive dysphoria and no one taught me how to deal with it, I had to learn on my own.
Here are some resources for those who struggle with it and want to get better about it.
My personal tip: Tell yourself it’s not personal. Tell yourself it’s not an attack, that setting a boundary is not a slight directed at you. Say it out loud or write it down.
Thank you! I’m glad both the initial point and the addition helped some people, based on the tags I saw. Thank you for the addition ☀️
especially house parties because if you don’t know who the fuck the host is then there’s a good chance you’ll never see them or their friends again so you can lie about fucking EVERYTHING. once i told a guy i was a guinea pig breeder like. for a living. and i was wearing ~8 inch platforms so i told him i always wore those to parties because i can’t wear them at home since that time i crushed a guinea pig. and sometimes you tell someone you used to be an internationally recognized cricket player but you broke your thumb playing chess and then you could never get back to being as good as you were so you assumed a new name and moved to a different country. and you can tell them that you lived in the woods for two years when you were a kid so you know how to start a fire and also communicate with foxes via hissing noises and smell. plus that time in the woods taught you what berries are NOT edible the hard way. also you had to have half of your small intestine removed (this HAS to follow the berry thing but you need a few minutes of distance inbetween those). don’t be afraid to get creative . eyebrow hair transplant. you invented a special knife but the fbi offered you 41 bucks for the patent and you really wanted to go ham at taco bell so you said yes. one of your toes doesn’t have bones so it feels like a boneless chicken wing. don’t be afraid to get creative .just be serious
perhaps one of my hotter takes as a queer person but i’m never coming out again. you can figure it out or live in pure ignorance but either way it’s not my problem. the worst thing society ever tried to teach us was that coming out is an obligation. it’s not. it’s a privilege for you to know the depths of who i am, my sexuality included.
is the world really such a terrible place? yesterday i asked if oat milk was extra and the barista said yes so i said ok just regular milk then and when she gave me my chai latte she whispered “i used oat milk ;)” doesnt that make u want to live another day?
here is my life philosophy: next week there might be someone ahead of you in line at the store who’s short a quarter and you have a quarter and you can give it to them. if you weren’t there, they’d have to put something back. the week after that you could be getting lunch and the waiter might ask if you want some pancakes someone else ordered and never picked up. you could find someone’s lost cat. you could watch someone’s bag while they go to the restroom. there are so many ways you are going to touch other people’s lives and they are going to touch yours and there’s no way to know when it’s going to happen. so you have to keep living!!! i wouldn’t want to die knowing that tomorrow the barista will give me free oat milk just to be nice.
When I was 11 years old - we went to Sea World for my birthday. This was to avoid the realization I had no friends, and no one to come to a birthday party and probably because someone gave my mother free tickets at work. It was kinda a shitty day despite being at a theme park full of cute animals. There was a new roller coaster there that had just opened so we decided to go on. I was nervous. I’d never been on a roller coaster.
A group of 6 college kids were ahead of us in line and started chatting with me. Full on just having a fun conversation with someone literally going through the beginning of a very awkward middle school period. I was so shocked they wanted to talk to me. I think my mom mentioned it was my birthday. They were very nice about it. When we got on the ride they told us to go ahead of them so we could sit at the front of the car since it held 8 people.
Now the ride (called Journey to Atlantis - I believe it is sadly no longer there) started with a slow ride of beautiful visuals of dolphins and oceans and computerized images of this imaginary Atlantis before going up the hill to the beginning of the coaster, where it paused for about 30 seconds, and then the ride started. The college kids must have known there would be a pause. Maybe they’d ridden it before I’m not sure.
But as we sat there on that peak, 6 people I’ve never known, and will never know again, sang a very very lonely 11 year old happy birthday. Loudly. And with gusto. They were happy and laughing and joyful. And it made me feel less alone in the world.
I am 29 years old this year, and I still remember them. I still remember that kindness. It is so important. It doesn’t go into a vacuum. It exists beside me in my daily life. And I love the idea that I have been that person to someone else too.
It’s stunningly lovely to be human when we’re kind to each other.
if i had seen the transition from sepia to color in wizard of oz in 1939 i would have lost my shit i would’ve started screaming in the theater
Okay no but like, I am still SO ENAMORED by this transition y’all, ‘cause when Dorothy opens the door of the house onto the colors of Oz, the inside of the house is still sepia toned. And they did that by literally making the interior and the costume and everything SEPIA TONED. You had a double for Judy Garland in a specifically-created sepia-toned dress, in a sepia-toned set, opening the door, backing out of frame, and then the Dorothy that steps back into frame is Judy Garland in her full color costume and makeup, stepping out into the color set.
It’s just
Y’all it’s such a GREAT EFFECT, and this was before computer effects and green screen, it was all practical and yeah it feels like nothing now, but at the time, man, not only was technicolor new, but I’m pretty sure no other movie had done a transition out of b/w or sepia into color, and even knowing it was a technicolor film, that must have just been fucking wild to see! It still is wild to see!! It’s so good.
The technique of switching between double and main actor without an edit is called a Texas Switch and it’s still used today, it’s very neat to have something so simple yet tricky persist pretty much just because it genuinely looks better to do it with timing than with editing.
